In my life, I’ve definitely subscribed to the theory that if I didn’t work hard for something than it probably wasn’t worth having. I’ve thought that if something was easy, I was missing some giant step that would teach me life lessons and make the struggle rewarding. But it turns out that sometimes things are easy and VERY worth having – they don’t require toil and striving and some monumental effort. Sometimes it just comes (and of course other times it doesn’t), but I don’t have to make it harder just for the sake of making it harder – just for the sake of proving something.
When I was young and went on group dates with friends, I would tell my girlfriends which guy I liked and to watch to make sure we were talking and if there was any pause, would they please interject? I was so scared of running out of things to say…which is ironic because I was the least likely of my friends to stop talking. I didn’t allow space for things to be what they were, to become what they could – I felt the need to narrate everything. I made it harder than it had to be.
This song was inspired by an email my mother sent me when I was going through a phase of making everything hard for myself. She knows how much I sometimes struggled not just to get through something, but to find the transformative moment or the silver lining. It’s like I was doubly hard on myself – struggling to get something done and then struggling to find the lesson in whatever I’d just done (or not done).
Sometimes you need that outside perspective to make you aware of what you’re doing, and to help you find that space into which you can step back and breathe, and take a break from yourself. The hope, of course, being that you can then step back into yourself with a little more perspective, and with it, compassion.
LYRICS: (Kat Parsons)
Why do you have to make it harder than it is
Baby just let it go
You might learn things, you never know
Because you’ve got your eyes closed
You’ve been working this old land
Rubbing raw your own bare hands
Every day, every night
You devoted your life
Don’t miss the forest for the trees
Pick your battles more selectively
Let me unravel that knot
That’s been pulling you tight
You always did what your mama said
But baby baby You don’t have to pay to get saved
Have a little faith
Baby make a little space
For something to grow
La la la la…
Why do you have to make it harder than it is?
**I get by with a little help from my friends: thanks Jodi Elliott for editing and focusing me.
If you haven’t heard this song, get it here: http://KatParsons.com/shop/
Do you make it harder than it is? Leave a comment to let me know you’re here and what you think….